The HyperTexts

Ivanka Trump Nicknames, Jokes and Quotes

This page contains the best Ivanka Trump nicknames, jokes and quotes that I have been able to find ...

The Top Ten Ivanka Trump Nicknames

Ivanka Tramp
Proxy Wife
Ivanka the Terrible (a pun on "Ivan the Terrible")
The First Daughter (Ivanka Herself) and The First Lady-Daughter

Ivanka Trump, when told she was a “staffer” by Steve Bannon reportedly said: “I’m not a staffer! I’ll never be a staffer. I’m the First Daughter and I’m never going to be a staffer!”

Ivanka Wanker (I Wanna Wank Her) and Ivanka Spanker (I Wanna Spank Her)
Trophy Daughter
Daughter Gate and Daughter Grate

Your kids may be all right, but Trump's kids are ALT-right and will never say boo about his racism, chauvinism, homophobia or xenophobic border wall.

Princess Royal (her nickname at the White House, according to insiders)
The Nordic Goddess and The Norwegian Wood Inducer
The Perfect Hanger (as a model she had the perfect body for hanging clothes) and Model, Inc.
Fount of Bad Advice (Steve Bannon, who also said that Donald Trump was like an 11-year-old child)

Marco Roboto hugs the First-Lady-Daughter ... talk about uncomfortable!



Make it the Top Twenty-Five Ivanka Trump Nicknames

Piece of Ass (her father Donald Trump, to Howard Stern)
Hot (Donald Trump) and Date Material (Donald Trump)
Daddy's Little Lapsitter
Trump's Daughter-Wife (Bill Maher)
The Favorite
The Hot One and The Cold One
The Icemaiden and The Vicemaiden
First Babe, the Real First Lady and the Surreal First Lady
The Queen of Leaks (Steve Bannon)
Glamorpuss and The Blonde Bomb Shill (Michael R. Burch)
Miss Ameri-Con and Miss Shamerica
Boobilicious and Boobs of Steal
No Bastion of Virtue (Vogue) and The Vague Covergirl
Brooklyn Barbie and Crooklyn Barbie
The Smart One and Michael (after Michael Corleone, "the smart one" in the Godfather movies)
Out-of-Touch Fluff and Miss Insubstantial (Dame Helen Mirren in People)

Currently Rising

Hillary Lite (after Ivanka used her private email account to conduct government business)
The Trans Sender Sh!email
Miss Social Media
Loose Lips Ivanka
Sing-Sing (will Ivanka end up in prison for singing state secrets in public?)
Jailbait

Will Trump be yelling and tweeting "Lock her up!" about the apple of his sty, after learning that Ivanka has been using her private email for government business? #LockHerUp #LockUpIvanka

In addition to her emails, federal investigators should examine Ivanka's feemails.

Trump's Senior Ad Vizier (Michael R. Burch, because Ivanka and the Trumps are using the presidency for personal profit)
Peace Treaty Barbie (Ivanka Trump) and Collusion Ken (Jared Kushner)
Dumbshit Barbie and Ken (Rosie O'Donnell)
Out-of-Touch Barbie
Zero Concern Barbie

Ivanka, the child of privilege who has never had to worry about missing a meal in her life, said she doesn't believe in a guaranteed minimum wage: "I think that this idea of a guaranteed minimum is not something most people want." However, a National Restaurant Association poll revealed that 71% of Americans supported raising the minimum wage, even if it meant paying more money for food.

Daddy's Little Ghoul
Daddy's Dearest

Ivanka claimed that being Donald Trump's daughter is "the hardest job in the world."

Domino I

Chris Matthews predicted that Ivanka Trump and Jared Kushner will be "the next dominoes to fall."

The Trump Card (the title of her 2009 book)
The Wild Card
The Red Queen ("Off with their heads!")
Russian Red Ivanka

This may be the strangest thing of all about Ivanka Trump. According to Felix Sater, when he took her on a tour of the Kremlin, she actually sat in Putin's chair and spun around twice. Think about that for a second. How does anyone get into Putin's office? How does anyone get to sit in Putin's chair? We can't do that, nor can 99.99% of the world's population. It sounds like collusion on a grand scale.

The Queen of Diamonds
The Grand Collusionist

The Nutcracker (Ivanka's only onstage role was as a dancer in The Nutcracker)
The Stupor Model

Jennifer Lopez reportedly once remarked, "She's only here because of her daddy."

American Psycho

Ivanka said she found Christian Bale "very attractive" in the movie American Psycho. Did he remind her of daddy?

Bosom Buddies (with Chelsea Clinton)
The Liberal
The Closet Feminist
The Patroness

Ivanka donated money to Hillary Clinton's 2008 campaign. Awkward. 

Princess Ivanta (as in "I vant a crown!")
HRH Ivanka (Her Royal Highness)
Little Miss Apartheid

Ivanka Trump was all smiles in Jerusalem during a photo-op at the new American embassy, while a short distance away Israeli snipers were firing live ammunition into crowds of Palestinian protesters, killing 58 people in a single day and wounding hundreds more. Altogether 101 Palestinians had been murdered and more than 10,000 wounded since the protests began, with more surely to follow.

Nicknames for Jared Kushner and Ivanka Trump:
J-Vanka (Cosmopolitan), Javanka (Steve Bannon), Jarvanka, Jiveanka, Jerkvanka, The Royals, The Royal Couple, The Royal Family (Rex Tillerson), The Globalists (Steve Bannon), The Railhead of All Bad Decisions (Steve Bannon), The Surrogates, The Brooklyn Hillbullies, The Children of the Corn, The Swamp Creatures, Creatures from the Orange Lagoon, The Dealmakers, The Developers, The Surrealtors, The Workaholics, The Shirkaholics, Trump's Girlfriends #1 and #2

Dishonorable Mention Ivanka Trump Nicknames:
Iva (Jared Kushner's nickname for his wife), Vanilla ISIS, Vanilla Vice-is, Kushner's Crush, Kushner's Cush Toy, Mrs. Kushner, Fifth Avenue Freeze-Out, The Surrogate, Eye Candy, I Candy, The Handmaid, The First Shady Lady, Con-suela, Connie, Clueless Connie, Ofjared, Ofdonald, The Golden Girl Grifter, Marvel (her Secret Service code name), Larval, Belladonald, Orange Widow, Blunder Woman, Bratgirl, Dupergirl, Catty Girl, Hawker Girl, Conagula, Fleur-de-Lay, GoDIVA, Lie Jinx, Bungle Girl, Bangle Girl, Lady Deadfool, Ladyhawker, Shadyhawker, Blightspeed, La Lunatica, Mag-duh-lean, Maiden Injustice, Manshunter, Maximum Deride, Meduser, Miss AmeriKKKa, Mockingturd, Miss Liberty (we will all miss Liberty, thanks to her father), Blightshade, Rainbow Smite, Painmaker, Trampage, Craven, Shadowhawker, Sham-rock, She-Bling, Squirrely Girl, Shun Girl, Bilkyrie, Vague, Hoodoo, Wallflower, Wallpower, The WASP, Web of Deceit Woman, Whirlygirl, The Blight Witch, Wild Bling, The Woman in Russian Red, Zealot, Money-Grubbing Attention Whore, FiDuFUS (First Daughter of the US), Brand Trump, the Brander, The Sacrificial Lamb, The Political Dilettante, Princess Ivanta, Princess Platitude, The Prodigal Daughter, The Lyin' King Tamer, The Lingerie Peddler, The Socialite, The Air-Kisser, The Swamp Mistress, The Feature from the Black Lagoon, Princess Disloyal, Royal Flush, Royal Douche, Ivanka Stank, Brooklyn Barbie, The Ice Princess of Queens, The Cold Con, Dumb as a Brick (Steve Bannon), Fucking Liar (Steve Bannon), The Bitch Is Dead (Steve Bannon), Jewish-American Princess, JAP, Snow White, Ball Buster (Bill Maher), Trump's Real Wife (Michael Wolff), Botlike (Michael Wolff), The Ivanabot, Ms. Roboto, Princess Iwanta-All-The-Time (Allan Ishac)

Ivanka Trump Quotes:

Ivanka Trump called her wedding ring "the hardware."
She said, "I obviously have a great love and appreciation of jewelry, thanks to my mother, much to the dismay of both my father and my boyfriends."
She said a date night with Jared "always involves me looking at one of his development sites."
She said that what she and her husband are really "passionate" about is looking at properties they own.
She said, "Real estate is my life. It is my day job, if you will. But it consumes my nights and weekends, too."
She said, "My greatest passion has [been], and always will be, real estate."
She admitted, "I've never lived in a building without my name on it."
She advocated lying, if it works to your advantage: "Perception is more important than reality. If someone perceives something to be true, it is more important than if it is in fact true. This doesn't mean you should be duplicitous or deceitful, but don't go out of your way to correct a false assumption if it plays to your advantage."

Like father, like daughter. The most important things in life are bling, real estate, and lying one's way to success!

What's up with WhatsApp? Ivanka Trump and Jared Kushner are Mr. and Mrs. Risky Business.

Related pages: Donald Trump Nicknames, Melania Trump Nicknames, Jared Kushner Nicknames, Ivanka Trump Nicknames, Donald Trump Jr. Nicknames, Eric Trump Nicknames, Ted Cruz Nicknames, Kellyanne Conway Nicknames, Mitch McConnell Nicknames, Jeff Sessions Nicknames, Sarah Huckabee Sanders Nicknames, Kellyanne Conway Nicknames, Mike Pence Nicknames, Brett Kavanaugh Nicknames, Paul Ryan Nicknames, Marsha Blackburn Nicknames, Stephen Miller Nicknames, Michael Cohen Nicknames, Matt Whitaker Nicknames, John Kelly Nicknames, Mick Mulvaney Nicknames, Donald Trump Cabinet Nicknames, Trump 45 Nicknames, Donald Trump: 666 Mark of the Beast, Is Donald Trump the Antichrist?

Ivanka Trump said there is a "special place in hell" for men like Sludge Roy Moore who prey on children. Did Ivanka just condemn her father to hell, since he bragged to Howard Stern that he barged into the dressing rooms of teenage beauty contestants to ogle them in the nude, because he was the owner of the pageants and could get away with it? There have also been multiple lawsuits filed against Trump by a girl who says he raped her when she was a teenager. And there are some very disturbing pictures of Trump with a young Ivanka perched in his lap. Trump has said more that once that he'd like to "date" his daughter, and we all know what happens to girls who date Trump.

Damien Trump and his Stepford Wives meet Pope Francis, who is obviously uncomfortable in the presence of such Darkness and angles his cross slightly to keep them at bay!



Trump Family Nicknames ...

The Stepfordians
The KKKardashians
The Brooklyn Hillbullies (Michael R. Burch)
Donald Duck Dynasty
The Four Norsemen of the Trumpocalypse (Michael R. Burch)
The Cold Ones
The Children of the Corn
Poor Little Bitch Kids
The Bitches of Eastwick

Have no fear, Acting President Jared Kushner is here! Cushy Kushner makes all the major decisions while Truant Trump tweets, poses for photo-ops, gropes women's genitals, sentences babies and grannies to death, cheats at golf, then brags about his "accomplishments" and campaigns for reelection. 



We can all breathe a sigh of relief because Jared "Jarhead" Kushner is at the ISIS front, using his real-estate negotiation skills to counsel our enemies and console our troops! Trump's youthful Aide de Kampf will never rest until WWIII is well underway, and completely irreversible. There will soon be a remake of Full Metal Jacket starring Jarring Kushner in Full Dinner Jacket (and Tie). Little Lord Fauntleroy will also star in Ralph Lauren of Arabia, The Shilling Fields, PeeWee's Big Adventure and Guess Who's Coming to Dinner then Whines about the K-Rations.

The Top Ten Jared Kushner Nicknames (Bolded) ...

Vanilla ISIS
Ralph Lauren of Arabia (@ChannelTrump)
Cushy Kushner and Little Cushball (Alec Baldwin on SNL)
Aide de Kampf (Michael R. Burch)
Putin's Puppet
Putin's Proxy
Putin's Protégé
Fratsputin
Comrade Kushner
The Easebroker
Nerd Boy
Jarhead
Jared "the Red" Kushner
Jarring Kushner
The Boy Blunder
Complete Fucking Idiot (Samantha Bee)
Little Lord Fauntleroy (Duratti on Daily Kos)
Nimrod (Nimrod, the son of Kush, was the founder of Babylon)
Son of Babylon
(the name Jared means "descent" so he is the "Son of Kush," the patriarch of Babylon)
The Crown Prince of Babble-On
Lucifer Incarnate
Channel 666 (Jared Kushner and his wife, Ivanka Trump, own the most expensive single building in the U.S. at 666 Fifth Avenue, purchased for $1.8 billion or 6+6+6 billion)

Please click here for all Jared Kushner Nicknames



Damien Trump
and his Stepford Wives meet Pope Francis, who is obviously uncomfortable in the presence of such Darkness and angles his cross slightly to keep them at bay!

Trump family nicknames: The Stepfordians, The KKKardashians, The Brooklyn Hillbullies (Michael R. Burch), Donald Duck Dynasty, Four Norsemen of the Trumpocalypse (Michael R. Burch), The Cold Ones, Children of the Corn, Poor Little Bitch Kids, The Bitches of Eastwick



Marco Roboto
hugs the First-Lady-Daughter, Ivanka Trump ... talk about uncomfortable!

Related pages: Famous Nicknames, Donald Trump Nicknames, Melania Trump Nicknames, Jared Kushner Nicknames, Ivanka Trump Nicknames, Donald Trump Jr. Nicknames, Eric Trump Nicknames, Rudy Giuliani Nicknames, Anthony Scaramucci Nicknames, Mitch McConnell Nicknames, Jeff Sessions Nicknames, Steve Bannon Nicknames, Sarah Huckabee Sanders Nicknames, Judge Roy Moore Nicknames, Kellyanne Conway Nicknames, Joe Arpaio Nicknames, Stephen Miller Nicknames, Sean Spicer Nicknames, Devin Nunes Nicknames, Michael Cohen Nicknames, Sam Nunberg Nicknames, Mike Pompeo Nicknames, Mike Pence Nicknames, Brett Kavanaugh Nicknames, Marsha Blackburn Nicknames, Diane Black Nicknames, Matt Whitaker Nicknames, John Kelly Nicknames, James Mattis Nicknames, Ann Coulter Nicknames, Rush Limbaugh Nicknames, Roger Stone Nicknames, William Barr Nicknames, Donald Trump Cabinet Nicknames, Marco Rubio Nicknames, Donald Trump: 666 Mark of the Beast, Is Donald Trump the Antichrist?, The Donald Trump Bible, The Best Donald Trump Puns, The Best Donald Trump Insults, Fact-Checking Trump, Donald Trump Funny Campaign Slogans and Parodies, Donald Trump Halloween Ideas, Donald Trump Poetry, Donald Trump Inauguration Poetry Donald Trump Curtsy or Bow?, Ten Reasons to "Fire" Donald Trump, Donald Trump Violence Quotes, Trump Trivia, Is there a Republican War on Women?, Conservatives Who Support Gay Marriage, 2016 Republican Debate, Ted Cruz Quotes, The Best Ted Cruz Jokes, The Wit, Wisdom and Very Impressive Vocabulary of Donald J. Trump, Trackdown Trump: Did a 1958 TV Show Predict Trump?

The HyperTexts