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Donald Trump's Fears: The Things He's Afraid Of

What are the things Donald Trump fears most? What are the things he's afraid of, that terrify him, that make him quake in his Man-Baby boots? Or is Trump as brave as he claims to be? We have done the highly scientific research, and here are the results ...



The picture above―the earliest known image of The Donald―is evidence that he was suckled in Emperor Palpatine's romper room. Trump is the world's biggest man-baby, and man-babies are afraid of many things. Man-Baby Trump is especially afraid of Truth, Democracy and the American Way. But there is one thing he fears even more ...

The Top Ten Things Donald Trump Fears Like the Devil

(10) Donald Trump is afraid of stairs, slopes and heights. There are pictures of him grasping railings and very carefully watching his feet as he ascends and descends.
(9) Donald Trump is afraid of germs. He has admitted being a germophobe. And he's especially afraid of women's cooties, especially Hillary Clinton's!
(8) Donald Trump is afraid of food, except McDonald's Big Macs. He must think the "special sauce" will kill all the germs!
(7) Donald Trump is terrified of eagles. Especially bald eagles. Do they remind him of a certain hairless part of his anatomy, perhaps?
(6) Donald Trump is terrified of sharks. He even told porn star Stormy Daniels that he will NEVER contribute to a shark charity!
(5) Donald Trump is terrified of unclean hands. He hates to shake hands because hands have a habit of picking up germs. Especially nasty women germs!
(4) Donald Trump is terrified of women's body fluids. Especially Megyn Kelly's and Hillary Clinton's body fluids. But also breast milk and pee in general.
(3) Donald Trump is terrified of Truth. Especially journalists who tell the truth about his lack of character, knowledge and competence.
(2) Donald Trump is terrified of Democracy and the American Way. Thus, he is doing everything he can to turn the US into a Banana Republic.
(1) Donald Trump is absolutely terrified of blood ...

Cadet Bone Spurs told Howard Stern that he flees immediately at the sight of blood: "If you cut your finger and there's blood pouring out, I'm gone." To demonstrate how intensely he detests and fears blood, Trump recounted turning his back on an elderly man who had fallen and appeared to be dying. Rather than signaling for medics, Trump complained loudly that the man's "disgusting" blood was staining Mar-a-Lago's immaculate marble floors! Incredibly, Trump later claimed that he would have rushed into a bloody hallway to confront a madman armed with an AR-15. I think Trump is clearly delusional, but let's give him the benefit of the doubt. His new superhero name is The Incredible Bulk. You won't like him when he's angry, and he's always angry, except when he's giddy with delusions about his awesomeness.

Other things Donald is afraid of: (1) serving his country, (2) paying those very scary taxes, (3) telling the NRA to keep its blood money, (4) Robert Mueller, (5) the FBI, (6) Hillary Rodham Clinton, (7) Barack Obama, (8) Vladimir Putin, (9) asking women for permission to kiss and touch them, (10) common decency, (11) admitting he's bald, (12) admitting that he's not a self-made man but inherited millions of dollars, (13) admitting he's been bankrupt more times than the world's worst Monopoly player, (14) admitting that he's not a Christian, has never read the Bible, and thinks Jesus Christ is "not a hero" but a "loser" because he died penniless with only the clothes on his back, (15) African Americans, Hispanics, Muslims and other minorities, (16) feminists and other independent-minded women, (17) women with the sense and good taste to tell him "No!"

Donald Trump is now ahead of Hillary Clinton in the polls. This was just reported in The Washington Post, and 2,000 years ago in the Book of Revelation.―Conan O'Brien

Let's get this straight: Trump releases the Nunes memo and the stock market immediately crashes 666 points. The federal budget deficit Trump's first fiscal year was 666 billion dollars. His family owns 666 Fifth Avenue, a street symbolic of money (Mammon). The Trump Tower is 203 meters tall, or 666 feet high.
On the Ides of March, he had 666 delegates. Trump was born on a blood moon. His ancestor who started the family business died on 6-6-6. Her name was Elizabeth Christ Trump. Elizabeth means "oath" so her name can be interpreted as "oath for Christ to be trumped." Is it just me, or are we living in a real-life Omen movie?

Trump plans to boost his increasingly fragile psyche by having tanks roll down Pennsylvania Avenue in a third-world-ish military parade, so call him the Banana Republican. As for people who support Trump despite his obvious unfitness for duty, just call those Republicans plain Bananas.

The Top Ten Donald Trump Nicknames

(#1) THE ANTICHRIST — when the prophets spoke of the "Trump of Doom" and a "little horn" were they speaking literally? (For a YUGE slew of 666 connections, see Is Donald Trump the Antichrist?)
(#2) Short-Fingered Vulgarian — by Graydon Carter (a nickname Trump hates because he thinks it implies that he is under-endowed "down there")
(#3) Agent Orange — by Anonymous (a lethal product of deMonsanto and DonSatan)
(#4) Golden Wrecking Ball — by Sarah Palin (who was not trying to be funny, but ended up being all too accurate ... so sad!)
(#5) Fuckface von Clownstick, Comedy Entrapment and Unrepentant Narcissistic Asshole (the UNAbomber?) — by Jon Stewart
(#6) The White Kanye ― by Bill Maher (or is Trump more accurately the Yellow-ish-Orange Kanye?)
(#7) Lord Voldemort, Orange Anus and Snake Oil Salesman — by Rosie O'Donnell
(#8) The Trump of Doom — by Michael R. Burch (adopted from the Bible and first used in a possibly prophetic Facebook post on September 11, 2015)
(#9) The White Pride Piper — Trump is the poster boy for the "Make AmeriKKKa Grate Again" movement of white supremacists, neo-nazis and skinheads
(#10) Man-Baby — by Jon Stewart (this one inspired an avalanche of jokes and similar nicknames; for instance, Robert De Niro called Trump "our Baby-in-Chief")

Donald Trump: Man-Baby-in-Chief

He' a Man-Baby. He has the physical countenance of a man, and a baby's temperament and tiny hands.―Jon Stewart

Even George Orwell could not have foreseen the rise of Big Baby Brother.—Michael R. Burch aka "The Loyal Opposition"


Q: What do you call it when a Man-Baby takes over the American government?
A: Coup d'Tot!

President Donald Trump signed bills in the  Roosevelt Room of the White House on Monday.

The Incredible Shrinking President uses the world's smallest pen and desk to sign his latest Dick-Tater proclamations. The women pictured are nannies beseeching the Boy Blunder to take a nap and stop bullying the world, but the Terroristic Man-Toddler will have none of that! Bratman believes in ACTION! According to CIA Director Mike Pompeo, the mADD Man-Imp prefers his "intelligence" to be delivered with colorful pie charts, maps, pictures, videos and "killer" graphics. In other words, make military intelligence more entertaining, more exciting, more fun―like a CARTOON! Such is the Boychurian Candidate's latest thought bubble! Fortunately the Combover Kid's undersized hands are too tiny, weak and delicate to key in the nuclear codes, but it's not for his lack of trying to destroy the world!

President Donald Trump holds up his pen after signing the Historically Black Colleges and Universities HBCU Executive Order, Tuesday, Feb. 28, 2017, in the Oval Office in the White House in Washington.

Trump's nannies applaud as Widdle Donnie Whinydiaper learns to operate a safety pen with his teeny-tiny fingers. The Brooklyn Brat is certainly proud of his "big boy" accomplishment. But so far no one has been able to potty-train the Boss Baby's mouth (much less his Twitter account)! Liddle Donnie Diaperpants was very excited by his unexpected victory in the 2016 presidential election: "After I had won, everybody was calling me from all over the world! I never knew we had so many countries!" Yes, and now Superbrat can do his three favorite things at the same time: cheat at golf, lie about his golf game, and destroy the world in between putts!



Man-Toddler Trump holds his bottle tightly, with two undersized infant hands, to avoid spills! The septuagenarian Water Boy―no, make that Water Baby―once belittled Marco Rubio for gulping water in public. But even Rubio the Unready was able to drink water one-handed! The Cry-Bully has the tiny hands and maturity level of a toddler, but as Eminem observed he is also our Racist Grandpa―out of whack with the times and wacky to boot. So let's give him the boot. The White Pride Piper has called entire nations "shitholes." The Grate Divider's solution to immigration? Import more Norwegians, more fair and blonde Ivankas! But if Trump was as smart as he claims, he'd know that Norwegians aren't going to sacrifice their much higher standard of living to slum under the thumb of a Xenophobic Ritz Cracker. Steve Bannon, the ultimate Trump insider, confirmed that he's the Pre-Teen President when Vanity Fair quoted him comparing Trump to an 11-year-old child! John Kennedy observed that with Trump in the driver's seat our government is like "a bunch of kids in the back of a minivan."

Little Donnie Discord just had another temper tantrum. He's mad at Jeff "Possum Boy" Sessions again―this time for blowing the Alabama election. After all, when Squirrely Sessions left the Senate, that triggered the election lost by Sludge Roy Moore. But who offered Sessions his current job? Of course it was Little Donnie Dimwit!

According to Senator Bob Corker, three Man-Babysitters are diligently trying to keep the nation from chaos: Rex Tillerson, John Kelly and James Mattis. Donald the Menace predictably started twittering insults and lies at Corker, whose sardonic reply was priceless: "It's a shame the White House has become an Adult Day Care Center. Someone obviously missed their shift this morning." In other words, the Man-Babysitters lost track of their brattish charge! Corker is not the only insider with that opinion, since Trump attorney Ty Cobb recently opined that he and General Kelly are "the only adults in the room" at the White House. That makes Trump a Juvenile Delinquent according to one of his senior advisers! Corker later accused Donald DeGonad of publicly castrating Tillerson. Wow, that is one mean Man-Baby!

The Constitution does not allow 13-year-olds to become president and now we can see why. Trump supporters voted for change, and boy, are they going to get it! — Garrison Keillor, who calls Trump the "Boy President"

"I will tell you the one description that everyone gave, everyone has in common: They all say he is like a child. And what they mean by that is, he has a need for immediate gratification. It is all about him." Fire and Fury author Michael Wolff revealed that "100 percent" of Trump's senior advisers and even his family, question his intelligence and fitness for office." Wolff quoted top aides calling Trump "a moron, an idiot." Why? "Let's remember, this man does not read, does not listen. So he's like a pinball, just shooting off the sides."

To see how Trump fulfills Biblical prophecies, please click the hyperlink.



Damien Trump
and his Stepford Wives meet Pope Francis, who is obviously uncomfortable in the presence of such Darkness and angles his cross slightly to keep them at bay!

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